Once Upon A Time In Cardiff

I was worried as I travelled down to Cardiff and not just because I staged what turned into the most dangerous overtaking manoeuver in history. It was beacuse I was meeting the four (previously three) minxs and the football league reporter and I thought they would poke fun at my freaky hairy fingers as they did on the last trip. Worse still they may spot that I have stumpy fingers to match. However hobbit boy escaped this attention and we concentrated on having a good time. I was outdone when it came to 'i have never' but then who has every gone joy riding in a milk float! I heard that this feat was repeated over the weekend.

Had we been playing today I could have said that "I have never shoplifted". It turns out that the magazines in waterstones (the glossy ones) should be paid for (£2.50). I must have looked like the most cocky theif this side of fagans den. I only realised when I got home. I dont know what to do. Should I return the read magazine, pay for it or keep quiet?

The trip went well, there was dancing, including some dancing with drunk men who smelt of cheese and hung aroung looking like a middle aged west side story gang. They were funny. I have video footage.

I also vaguely remember doing my very well oiled robot and MC Hammer dances. Perhaps it is for the best that the minxs and my paths may never cross again. The minxs had a warmth about them, could draw a smile from any person and all had a glint in their eyes.

Editors comments - under no circumstances should this post been interprited as condoning theft or joyriding. Criminality in any form, although humourous in certain circumstances, is not big and is not clever

Valentines Day Blues

My word I did not think study would be so intensive that I would be sat at my desk on valentines day studying about... well you really dont need to know. Still I have some chocolates for comfort. They are shaped like hearts and taste like an autumn sunset (and milk chocolate). There is also the light at the end of the tunnel that I am off to Cardiff this weekend to meet up with the three minxs' and the football league reporter.

I am going to introduce the group to "I have never" - the hilarious drinking game. They say the devils water aint so sweet but the City of Cardiff is where that isnt quite true. I will try to be good.

I know i have neglected this part of my life, as i have neglected many other things recently, but bear with me. I have been poorly sick. I think it is man flu but i am not sure. My symptoms are as follows;
the sniffles
body aches
feel sorry for myself
dependancy on night nurse
desire to be waited on day and night

I have also been feeling really home sick lately (unusual) and with this I have lost my va va voom. I feel like something is missing but I dont know what. It is wierd. I am not sure if it is desire for adventure of a feeling that I have not achieved. I cant remember the last good deed I did (worrying). I dont know if I need purpose, inspiration(like what alcoholics refer to as a moment of clarity), guidance or something to drive me. I have listened to 'Hurt' by Johnny Cash a lot(depressing). Feel like I am running on empty at the moment and it is probably just the man flu getting me down.

If my life was a Tom Cruise film I would be at the point where I am having a crisis of confidence but i will emerge from this stronger, more successful and supported by more uplifting music. Like when Goose died in Top Gun and he went on to save that big boat with the headmaster from Back To the Future on it.

Too descriptive?
Sorry.
I will tone it down.